SWEET REPEAT! King Hippos Champions!

It was a banner night for the plucky and courageous King Hippos on Thursday, as the Orange stampeded to kickball glory over the course of two exciting matches.

Due to permit issues, the regularly scheduled semifinals and championship match, normally held on two fields, were confined to a single, makeshift field in the corner of the Common that led to a degree of adventure for all teams involved.

The semi-final match between the Blue Steel and league winner Scoregasm was scrubbed when Scoregasm were forced to forfeit due to a dearth of registered players.

The King Hippos then took the field against Gettin’ Cider. Cider had defeated the Hippos handily during the regular season, so the Orange were in the mood for payback.

The Hippos struck first in the bottom of the opening inning. Cider tied it in the bottom of the frame, but they would never lead.

The Hippos’ offense came to life in the second inning as the middle of the order pushed five runs across the plate.

Explosive offense, combined with cracker jack defense appeared to cow the normally feisty Cider.

The game’s webgems both went to gold glove third baseman Kevin who managed to steal a sure base kick and probable RBI with a wild diving catch. The second came on a close play at third as Reilly collected a relayed throw and, in mid-air, fired the ball into the diving runner’s back. The runner was safe, but was forced to earn it on what had no right being a close play.

“It was a thing to see, really impressive,” said Captain Big. “I’ll tell you what, you gotta love that spirit!”

The Cider managed to score three runs in the bottom of the fourth, but by then, the mood in the park showed the game’s result was a forgone conclusion. The Hippos were charging and wouldn’t be denied their triumph.

Defeating their rivals left the Hippos nearly rabid, so one almost felt sorry for their next opponents.

Fate, it would seem, is not without a sense of humor, as the 2009 MA Patriot Summer Championship turned out to be a replay of the 2008 final.

Blue Steel, the team that the then Green Team had squeaked by the previous year and managed to defeat in both of their regular season meetings this year, stepped up to the plate and the still-thundering Hippos quickly made it clear they were not about to be silenced.

The Hippos’ defense remained solid and the offense remained potent.

The Orange plated three runs in the first and another two in the second off of Season and Playoff MVP Colin “The Man Of” Steele’s first career homerun.

Steele had four RBIs on the day, his foot coming alive at just the right time for the Hippos. He was awarded the season MVP award, not solely for off-field contributions, but for a near perfect on-field performance throughout the playoffs.

“The MVP award wouldn't mean anything if we hadn't won the championship,” panted Steele. “That's always the main goal. And there's no ‘MVP’ in ‘team’. OK, there's an ‘M’, but whatever. Anyways, as I was saying, I'm honored I could help finish on top… That's what she said.”

As the light left the field, both teams began to struggle and safety, in the bottom of the fourth, became an issue. Before the Steel were able to record an out, the officials called the game to a halt for safety concerns: The final score, a convincing 10-1 for the Hippos.

Despite the game’s abbreviated nature, the Hippos were jubilant.

“It's freakin’ awesome!” cried Asian. “Hippos win! Woohoo! I'm hungry!”

“I feel fantastic!” shouted Shookie. “Like the happiest hippo alive!!”

“In Africa hippos are responsible for more deaths among humans than crocodiles,” counseled BK. “The hippo will wait just below the surface of the water and flip a passing boat, destroying the vessel and, often times, killing or seriously injuring anyone in the craft. Well, tonght, a special breed of hippos -- The Champion King Hippos -- waited just below the surface and didn't miss the chance to destroy a couple of boats named Gettin' Cider and Blue Steel.”

“I’d say that was a pretty successful season,” laughed Captain Big, eyes moist. “What a great group of players. I look forward to playing with these guys for many seasons to come.”

Most of the Hippos squad will reconvene on the hallowed fields of MA Minutemen in Somerville this fall under the banner of Grilled Cheese Sandwich. We all wish the squad continued success and spirit as they carry forth the spirit of kickball at its best and most fun.

Gettin' Hungry

Captain's Note: Week Finals

Greetings Hippos!

I hope you're all well-rested after a nice weekend of mild conditioning and coordination drills, no drinking or carousing, early curfews and light reading.

This week, we face our deadliest foe in Semi-Final battle: Gettin' Cider.

Never has the Common seen a team filled with such scum and villainy. Never has a kickball team been so reviled and spat upon. Never has this guy (with two thumbs) enjoyed seeing two players run smack into each other resulting in a lot of trauma over a lightly blooded lip.

The Cider are a solid team. They have a strategy. They have skill.

But they have been beaten. And according to one source, they have their own Hippo... and not the good kind. She stands over by second base and can't catch a ball to save her life.

But that all aside: We are the King Hippos, the noblest of all Hippos. We will go out there, heads held high, confident in our own skills and strategy, and in the fact that Captain Big has properly walked off the base paths.

We can adapt if their infielders prove too adept at fielding the bunt, or we can show them what a real bunt looks like.

Regardless of what happens, I want you all to know this season has been fantastic. You're the best group of kickballers I've played with since... since... well, since last season.

Go time this week is 6:30. We play on the grass field, which has been our house all season.

The Final will be played at 7:15 on the dirt between the winner of our match and the victor of the Scoregasm-Blue Steel matchup.

In other news, last week's recap is up.

As always, please let me know if you're in or if you're going to be watching us on TV from your hospital bed after being side-swiped by a pick-up after a big win and turning down your friend-from-the-other-side-of-the-tracks' offer to come out partying and then going on to compete in the Special Olympics and then dying in another car accident this time with a drunk driver.




Captain Big
King Hippos

"It was Bruce Banner, not David Banner, you oppitwat."

Hippos Find Pitches – Move on to Semis

Thursday saw the Hippos squad move on to the MA Patriot Summer Semis for the second consecutive year as they rumbled over the upstart Where My Pitches At, 6-1.

A late start due to equipment issues meant both sides were a little stiff as the first inning kicked off. The Hippos defense held strong all night, however, preventing the Pitches from getting anything going.

In the bottom of the first, newcomer to the top of the lineup, FBJ, kicked in her second RBI of the season as Asian was able to come around.

The third inning saw the Hippos add two more runs as both Tristan and Ray plated Tangerine and Tomato for their own RBIs.

The Pitches were able to pull one back in the top of the fourth, but the Hippos then broke it open in the bottom of the inning. The Giant part of the lineup: Big, BK and Reilly, managed to knock in three runs, including Asian, who scored twice on the night.

Her base running combined with an important catch on a towering fly ball in the Cambridge dark earned Asian the Game MVP belt which she wore with pride.

“It was a big game,” said Captain Big afterwards. “But the Hippos are big. They’ve got big hearts, big teeth and big haunches... I mean consciences. They live in big rivers and take big bites out of anyone who comes too close.”

After the victory, the Hippos are looking forward to their semi-final matchup against Gettin’ Cider.

"Right now, my focus is entirely on beating Gettin' Cider,” said team Security Specialist Tristan. “And going to the bar. Possibly not in that order."

Some are looking harder than others.

"We came. We saw. Then we didn't see too good,” spouted Brow. “We caught some balls in the face. Then I think we won. They just told me to get off the field."

Yes...this is a real song.


From the 1971 release "Steppenwolf 7"

Words and music by Larry Byrom and John Kay

If I should go astray and say "I lost my way" nobody would know me
But if I don't believe I can and still say "Hear my plan"
Somebody would follow just because it's free

We're all Hippos rollin' down the river
Sometimes we can't touch the ground
Like Hippos slidin' in the water
Somehow we're stompin' around

If you should go astray and say "I lost my way" nobody will know you
But if you don't believe you can and still say "I'm your man"
Somebody will follow just because it's free

We're all Hippos rollin' down the river
Sometimes we can't touch the ground
Like Hippos slindin' in the water
Somehow we're stompin' around

Now you can see me lyin' down in my swamp
Any time I feel disgusted
You'll see me do the hippo stomp

You stop and watch me while you're out on your midnite romp
And I can feel the silent question
What the heck is the Hippo Stomp?

Hey! Hey! You should try it when you're feelin' blue
Let me answer you and let me tell ya true
Just how I feel when I'm down
Sometimes I wonder
You'll see me stumblin' around
But you just point and stare
Come on let me hear ya
Somewhere there's a voice down inside
And when you find it let it teach you how to ask the question "why"
Just because we live together
We don't have to like each other
So please don't fall asleep on me again
Nobody, nobody, nobody knows for sure
You just might never wake up from the dream
Hey! Speak up let me hear ya
Let me show you 'round the reservation
I know my way around these parts
I've lived here long enough
Now you can have a taste, an indication
Of things and times to come
Early in the morning, late at night
Somebody seems to know just how this thing work's right
'Cause every time I come around the corner somebody's looking out my door
He's been snoopin' like a hound
I'll grab his neck and shake him on down

Repeat Chorus

Now you can see me lyin' down in my swamp
Any time I feel disgusted
You'll see me do the Hippo Stomp

Captain's Note: PLAYOFFS

Greetings Hippos!

Congratulations! You've made it! You chosen few! You band of brothers (and sisters)!

The King Hippos shall rumble into playoffs this season seeded third.

This Thursday will see the first round of playoffs as teams strive for kickball glory. It's a familiar thing, glory. We were the lucky number who held that glory last season and I think we're hungry hungry enough to grasp it again.

On Thursday we play Where My Pitches At!

We defeated this plucky squad in week three
, but your captain insists you take nothing for granted. We'll take the field this week knowing there are no guarantees in kickball. There's a reason the sport isn't played on paper.

Game time is at 7:15 on field two. Let's bring our game!

Lemme know if you're in or if you're the kind of person who misses the first game of kickball playoffs (even if you've already told, me plzkthx).

We also have reffing duties for game one on field one between Scoregasm and Charity Case. I'll take whatever help I can get!

In other news: The recap for last Thursday's contest is up at the Munt And Flip.

In other other news: the End of Season Party Blowout has been planned for August 22nd, 2009 at Jose Mac's from 7PM - 10PM. We've joined forces (and budgets) with MA-Ivy division allowing us to provide not only FREE BEER, but also a host of finger food goodies for party-go-er's to nibble on. As usual, the Guest fee will be $10 a guest, and we will be holding a 50/50 raffle drawing as well, with all proceeds going towards the divisions charities!

All right boys and germs, let's take it to the Pitches this week so we can play some MORE kickball NEXT week!!!

Captain Big
King Hippos

"M1A1... thousand miles an hour..."

Hippos Meringue Key Lime Killahs

Thursday was stoppage time kickball for the MA Patriot Summer 2009 kickball division as teams made up their rainout games from Week 5.

The Hippos came into the match riding high on a two game winning streak, looking to make it three. After a close game in the long grass of Cambridge Common, the plucky Hippos came out on top, 5-1.

The first four innings saw limited offensive production on both sides as both teams showed excellence on the defensive front.

Cracks began to show in the foundation, however, when the Hippos struck in the fourth as Zach managed to come home on a bunt triple by Asian which had one bench scratching their heads and the other nearly rabid with excitement.

When asked about the adventurous baserunning, Zach panted: “I dunno, I just kept running. I probably could have left third a few seconds early but, really, it’s way more fun to lunge for home you really shouldn’t.”

Karma struck back at the Hippos in the bottom of the inning, however, when Asian made a play on a high fly ball in the outfield, slipped in the swamp and managed to bicycle kick the ball further into left field, allowing the Killahs to plate their own ill-earned run.

“I don’t know where my feet went!” exclaimed Asian.

Despite the setback, the Hippos remained resolute and their drive immediately paid dividends in the top of the fifth inning.

New to the top of the order, FBJ made her way on base with a smart bunt, followed by Big who reached with a munt of his own. After Brow popped out, game MVP BK broke it open with a two run double. He and Kevin would later score on a two run triple booted by Aimee, which might been a two out double, had she not run her housemate Squints into a tag out between third and home.

Four runs, as it happened, was enough to fend off the Killahs in the bottom of the fifth, as Colin doused the Killahs comeback hopes with an impressive single handed double-play. The victory gave the Hippos their third win in a row and an extra boost to their morale as they go into playoffs the confident third seed.

“There was a great spirit out there,” said Squints. “We had an awesome crowd rooting for us and, in the end, that’s why we play kickball: for the fans.”

“I dunno about fans,” said Pete. “I play for the healthy competition. And nothing healthy isn’t better without a nice serving of dessert. This week on the menu: Key Lime Pie."