Bandits Come Up Short in Close Match Against Former Leaders of the Free World


Monday night’s matchup between the Wet Bandits and the Ex-Presidents was a true corker. With big plays, big scores and even bigger collisions, the fans were treated to one of the more exciting games of the 2010 Fall Season.

The mayhem started in the top of the first inning, when Bandits Big and Frey collided spectacularly in the outfield.

A slightly woozy Frey later said, "They say that when you’re about to die, the most important people in your life flash before your eyes. Last night, in the moments before I collided with Big, I had a vision. And that vision was Catie Mills."

“Wait,” said Catie. “Who are you? How’d you get in my house?”

“Also wait,” added Big. “I ran into someone? Is that what that bump was? I really didn’t think anything of it…”

The Ex-Presidents managed to put five runs across in the first inning, but the Bandits began chipping into that lead right away, with a run in the first, when Big managed to push the speedy Yuval across.

The Bandits’ defense then held strong through the rest of the game, only allowing one more run in the fourth inning. Meanwhile, the offense got two more runs back in both the third and fourth innings off of enterprising running by Nancy, Nathan and Asian.

The second collision came in the top of the third at second base when Nathan’s knee met Ex-President Paul’s head. Like half of the NFL quarterbacks this season, it was quickly determined that Paul was concussed and he was led off the field to a round of applause from both sides.

“It was pretty scary,” said Big. “Kickball can sometimes get a bit heavy, but you hate to see anyone get hurt. We hope to see Paul out on the fields next week, if only so that Nathan can buy him a pitcher!”

The Bandits’ Nancy also had a somewhat rocky night as she, first, jammed a finger on a fly ball in the first and later caught it in the face in the third.

“I really had a rough night,” said Nancy. “Apparently two weeks off was too much for me because clearly I wasn't in catching mode. Not only did I sprain my finger in the first inning trying to catch a fly ball, that same ball decided it didn't do enough damage and smacked me in the face in the third.”

The play in the third should make the highlight reel, though, as the high pop-up floated on her, came off her hands, then face and bounced up behind her where Game MVP BK caught it before it hit the ground.

As the plucky Bandits kept the pressure on, the Ex-Presidents’ early lead shrank to one run in the fifth. Some of the chatter got a bit personal.

“You're going down Jen ‘Baseball Pants’ Eaton!!!” cried Phil.

The Presidents were able hold off the Bandits, though, ending the nail-biter in the bottom of the fifth with some solid defense.

The Bandits will be looking to bounce back next week when they face off against Chicks Like It Tickled.

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