Week 1: Captain's Note

Greetings Hippos!

If you guys are one tenth as pumped as I am for today's opening day festivities, we may incinerate Cambridge. The season's late start has been building up the Dr. Frankenstein antici..... pation to a near fervent level. Today has been a long time coming.

So, first question: Who on the roster will be waiting even longer because they can't make it tonight (due to missing limb, house inexplicably exploding, your inconsiderate prick of a boss)?

I'm putting together tonight's fielding and kicking lineup, so I'd appreciate you letting me know who's IN and who's Not IN (for today).

As I said in my previous email, today's game is against Scoregasm, a team captained by one of our (friendly) rivals last season. Today is our first chance to continue reminding him how much cooler we are by schooling his club on the kickball field.

And speaking of fields, today we play on Field 2, which is the grass field in the opposite corner of the Common from the dirt field. We are, in fact, slated to play five of our eight regular season games on this field, so we'll need to get used to the way the grass slows down pitches and can be slippery for those wearing regular sneakers. If you have soccer cleats (no metal studs), they will help immensely here. Baseball and Football boots are okay as well, but they can make it tough to kick, since that's not what they're designed for. Turf shoes can be effective both on the grass and on dirt. Obviously, I'm not going to demand that my players go out and buy boots, I'm just sayin', they can be very helpful.

Ok, that's all I'm going to say now. Let's get buck wild tonight! If you can't make it, lemme know!

Captain Big
King Hippos

"You know, there are many people in the country today who, through no fault of their own, are sane... It is up to people like you and me who are out of our tiny little minds to try and help these people overcome their sanity."